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100 Word Challenge for Grown Ups – Week #21 – 100 words – A picture prompt – light reflected on the glass of a worn old framed window – “Undone”

01 Dec

A worn, tired old frame surrounds a window. The glass, still intact bar one, reflects on the passing world. A house… seen many lives pass through. What ghosts may linger within?

I stand transfixed.

Silence, then a whisper, “Why stand you there?”

The mind plays tricks but, no, again the whisper.

Reflections shimmer, the world outside fades, the face of a child appears, translucent.

She smiles, “Why stand you there?”

“Who are you?”

“I’m your child who never was.”

My paternal longing undone.

Tears well in my eyes, “My child?”

“Fear not father,” her face fades, the outside world returned.

Schools and students have permission to use this graphic for non-commercial, educational purposes.

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24 responses to “100 Word Challenge for Grown Ups – Week #21 – 100 words – A picture prompt – light reflected on the glass of a worn old framed window – “Undone”

  1. Lynda Dixon

    December 1, 2011 at 01:29

    Wow. That sent a shiver down my spine.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 1, 2011 at 06:38

      Thanks for the comment.

      It sent shivers down my spine when I thought of it because it touches on the truth. 🙂

       
  2. annahalford (@anhalf)

    December 1, 2011 at 02:47

    gripping stuff! well written.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 1, 2011 at 06:39

      Thanks for the comment.

      It speaks of many who dream of parenting.

       
  3. Midlife SInglemum

    December 1, 2011 at 05:57

    So sad. I want more.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 1, 2011 at 06:41

      Thanks for the comment.

      The story continues in the minds of those who wish to be parents.

       
  4. Jasmine Dwyer

    December 1, 2011 at 17:03

    I read this whilst out walking this morning at 5.30am….eerie……the trees looked differently almost whispering secrets, the stars sneekily winked at me, the moonlight vanished and the dawn was cooler than usual….

    I RAN HOME!

    Your writing definitely moved me. And isn’t that the best accolade you can get as a writer? Well done.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 1, 2011 at 17:24

      Thanks for the comment and compliment.

      Being able to move a reader through words is certainly the goal for a writer. 🙂

       
  5. georgehuthart

    December 2, 2011 at 00:39

    Ross I wanted to say thanks for your comments to our blogs. Thanks so much. We will visit here regularly too. Kind regards George H Norbridge Academy

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 2, 2011 at 05:32

      There’s no problem with the commenting on your blog. I spend a fair bit of time visiting school/class/student blogs and leaving comments. It’s ended up a sort of hobby. 🙂

       
  6. Sparks In Shadow

    December 2, 2011 at 10:00

    So sad a story. I understood it well in these 100 words.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 2, 2011 at 21:18

      Thanks for the comment.

      The story is touched with truth for me.

       
  7. susankmann

    December 3, 2011 at 09:14

    So well written. Such a sad story, would love to read more.

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 3, 2011 at 10:16

      Thanks for the comment.

      There’s a touch of reality in this short story.

       
  8. Robin Hawke

    December 3, 2011 at 09:56

    Love the way the first paragraph sets up the rest, excellent, Robin

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 3, 2011 at 10:19

      Thanks for the comment.

      I often try for more lighthearted writing as I want this blog to be suitable for children to read but the prompt gave me the idea for a more serious story. With the change, I also altered the writing style a little. I like these short story opportunities to stretch the mind a little. 🙂

       
  9. jfb57

    December 4, 2011 at 07:47

    I moved the 100WCGU to this blog so that folks could extend their writing & perhaps not be quite that suitable for the children to read whilst still being reasonably PG.
    This is such a sad piece that tells such a story of yearning I think. Thank you for sharing Ross!

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 4, 2011 at 20:42

      Thanks for the comment.

      My stories can drift towards PG but I like the challenge of writing to exact limits while keeping them suitable if a child reads them.

      The yearning was there. 🙂

       
  10. ventahl

    December 4, 2011 at 12:15

    haunting and melancholic, ross. You put your heart into this, I venture?

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 4, 2011 at 20:43

      Thanks for the comment.

      Yes, I’m the one looking on. 🙂

       
  11. gsussex

    December 4, 2011 at 22:53

    Wow, deep . . ! Very moving

     
    • Ross Mannell

      December 4, 2011 at 23:07

      Thanks for the comment.

      Yes, this was a little deeper than normal for me. 🙂

       
  12. ramzaan

    December 12, 2011 at 23:15

    Do you rember Abbas & Ayub I a am is friend Ramzaan you said if I could have one super power, what should I choose. I think all powers

     
  13. ramzaan

    December 12, 2011 at 23:16

    I ment am his frend

     

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